The Secret To Getting Picked
Wanting to get picked is something that we all want as dancers right?
We want to get picked for the job, picked for the solo, picked to demonstrate, picked for it all!
But sometimes it may seem like the same people keep getting picked over and over again: the favorites, the ones who seem to just have what they are looking for.
You see the principals of the company shine with what seems like perfection and you see the adoration they are getting from the director. You see the other company members getting picked for soloist roles. You see the other dancers in the audition room getting picked to move to the next round and if you aren’t one of them, it may seem like there’s something wrong with you or that you’re missing something. Missing that thing that sets you aside from everyone else. Missing that “it factor” that is getting everyone else picked but you.
Please know that if you’re feeling this way you’re not alone. I have many clients that come to me feeling this way and the truth that we always come to find is that there isn’t anything wrong with you, your brain is just confused.
Let me show you what I mean.
Your brain sees everyone getting picked and assumes that they have the answer, which is partially true, but what your brain thinks is the answer is them and so it starts telling you that you need to be exactly like them so you can get picked too.
So you begin to copy their habits, their artistry, their everything. You start to compare yourself to everyone in the room and think, “if I can just be exactly like them, I’ll be what they’re looking for.”
But no matter what you do, you can’t seem to be exactly like them and get the same attention or the roles they’re getting. And in addition to not getting what they have or what you want, it all feels so hard. You’re trying so hard and barely getting half the attention. It doesn’t look hard for everyone else. They don’t have to try to be what the director wants. They just are what they want. So why is that?
What you’re seeing in these other dancers is not them manipulating themselves to be what the artistic director or their teacher wants. It’s also not some unattainable “it factor” that’s only available to the special few.
It’s actually just authenticity. It’s the acknowledgment and love of who they are as dancers and as humans.
When you experience a dancer who genuinely loves who they are, trusts in themselves, and has their own back, their energy becomes radiant and palpable. They are able to pick up combinations faster because they aren’t second-guessing themselves. They are able to take risks in the rehearsal room because they are willing to go too far if it means that on the way they create magic. They volunteer to be in the first group. They stand in the center of the room. They are present in the moment because they know who they are is their greatest asset.
That is what directors and teachers are attracted to and that is what’s getting them picked.
The secret to being picked is being you, not being them.
You, right here and now are exactly what they are looking for, but by trying to change yourself and be the “perfect” dancer you were cutting off the totality of yourself. You were hiding the very thing that’s going to get you picked.
And in the process of “making” yourself what they want, you were feeling an immense struggle because you were trying to be something you’re not. You’re trying to be like everyone else, but the company already has everybody else.
What the company really wants is you. You, in all your uniqueness. You, in all the individuality you possess.
So as you move through the next season of your dance career remember that there’s no one like you and that is the best news you could ever get.
You are the piece of the puzzle they are looking for. You are the solution to their problem and the more love and belief you have in yourself, the more this will feel true and the more this feels true the more freedom and power your energy has to shine.
Here are my top 3 favorite exercises to strengthen your belief in yourself.
Create a Brag Book
Get a journal or make a note on your phone and then fill it with everything you are proud of and love about yourself. And I mean everything! Then look at it every day and add onto it regularly.
Mirror Love
Look at yourself in the mirror every day. Start with 2 minutes and after a week increase it by 1 minute until you get to 5 minutes. When you are looking at yourself, bring in the energy of love and acceptance. At first, you may hear your brain offer criticism. Know that that’s normal and know the more you practice acceptance and love for your body the less the criticism will be there.
Best Friend Talk
Talk to yourself like you would talk to your best friend. Before a class, rehearsal or a performance, how would you hype up your best friend? Practice giving yourself the same support you would to them. When your best friend is having a hard day how do you comfort them? What if you were able to give yourself that same comfort?
These are only some of the many ways to strengthen your belief in yourself and I encourage you to make these your own. Take my exercises and make them feel perfect for you.
If this is something you are wanting to work on more in-depth and at a 1:1 level, coaching is the next step for you.
I work with my clients for 6 months so that they have time to create the results they are wanting and more! To schedule a free consult for coaching click here.
And in the meantime, I would love to connect with you on Instagram! Follow me here @rachel.josefina
If you liked this post, you might also like: